Sonic SatAM: Landslide
by mrbyrondunbar
Summary: At some point in an imaginary third season of the 1990s Saturday morning cartoon show, Sally Acorn finds herself stifling in the role of a princess on her way to becoming a queen, and drifting apart from her friends.


"_Well, I've been afraid of changing_

_'Cause I've built my life around you_

_But time makes you bolder_

_Even children get older_

_And I'm getting older too"_

Fleetwood Mac

**FROM SALLY ACORN'S JOURNAL Aug. 16, 4013**

When I was a child, I believed everything I was told. I fell for every tall-tale Sonic flung my way. I trusted the mustached warlord who insisted he had the crown's best interests at heart. I believed mother as she lay on her deathbed and whispered that I could handle anything. This made for more than a few scraped knees and torn dresses, and that frustrated father to no end. But the confidence I earned served me better as a Freedom Fighter than a sheltered princesses' upbringing would have. Yet even at that age, I knew that most people would have traded anything for exactly that. Although I never felt that way, others saw me as special just because I was royalty. They humbled themselves, and that made me uncomfortable. I never dreamt that within a few short years we'd be hiding together in a remote village. Then I'd be the one who had to prove myself to them.

Father's attitude was different. He didn't like it when I went out adventuring. It wasn't just because Sonic and I frequently got into trouble. It was because I didn't see the crown as anything spectacular. I was certain my blood didn't place me above others, especially my friends. "She'll grow to be a monarch that won't rule her people," father lamented. "Instead, she'll be ruled by them."

Honestly, I wouldn't have it any other way. On the calmer nights in Knothole, I insisted to my friends that a princess serves her people. Not the other way around. I never really knew what it meant to be a princess anyway. It was just something for Sonic to tease me with. On bruised feet, we'd tread through the darkest corners of Robotropolis. As I'd search for a safe clearing, Sonic would stand upon a pile of newly decimated robots. He'd coolly observe the fresh cuts etched in my face and smile. With that gleeful gleam in his eyes he'd mock me with the line, "You never looked more beautiful Princess." The best part was that he really meant it.

During the war, the only concern I had related to the crown was pining for father. I didn't care how many people insisted he was dead. Holding out hope for his return gave my life meaning. Truthfully, it didn't matter if he was alive or dead. Believing the former helped me center myself. He was alive to me, and that was what mattered. I believed father still breathed the same way I believed there was nothing I couldn't overcome. It wasn't until we defeated Robotnik that I questioned myself. When Snively released father and Naugus from the Void, I realized how harsh the line between belief and reality was. Yes, we had known for some time that father still lived. Though somehow, I still believed his existence depended almost entirely on my idealized memories of him. That illusion was shattered after his rescue. The moment he arrived in Knothole, he began counting my mistakes in loving detail. From age six to fifteen, I never would have thought he'd do that. I wouldn't have believed it even last summer. But father's return carried with it a revelation. I can handle war, but I can't handle anything else.

These thoughts preyed upon my mind constantly, but overflowed one particular evening. I was in a small hut, taking care of monitor duty. Through a window I saw the moon shining from Knothole's eastern horizon. It lit a fertile field of crops, behind which lay a waterwheel. It was connected to the hut Bunnie and I shared. I decided I could use a break, and wandered over. Upon entering, I overheard Bunnie in Tails' room. She was reading him a bedtime story. Silently, I took a seat in the kitchen and waited for her to finish. "And then Cinderella says, 'Oh mah stars, thank you ever so much fo' all dem purdy Knick Knacks 'n thangs!" read Bunnie. "And the nice ol' Fairy Godmother replies, 'Wait till th' Prince sees you!"

"Was she pretty Bunnie?" asked Tails bashfully.

"You bet sugar!" replied Bunnie. "But thass enough fo' t'night." She kissed his forehead and stepped into the hall. "Hey Bunnie," I said from the kitchen, smiling weakly. "Howdy Sally-girl!" Bunnie began cheerily, before noticing my sullen expression. Concerned folds marked her brow; she was about to speak before Tails interrupted her. "Aunt Sally's here?" I heard him ask excitedly. "Uh-uh," said Bunnie, waving a metallic finger. "It's bedtime hon. Be a good l'il ol' soldier."

"Aw," I heard Tails reply softly. "Alright then."

"Thassa good boy." Bunnie grinned, and turned her head toward me. "You look like you've been sassed sumpin' awful," she whispered after she shut the door behind Tails.

"It's nothing Bunnie," I pined. "It's just that Daddy-," I faltered for a moment. "The king has been giving me a hard time."

"Want to talk about it?" queried Bunnie. I let out a long sigh, and collapsed over the kitchen table like a dirty cloth. "He doesn't seem to realize he's been gone for the past ten years," I muttered. "I've been winging it up to this point."

"Whatcha mean sugh?" asked Bunnie. She placed her soft hand on my shoulder.

"I don't know where to begin."

"Start slow…what's he doing?"

"He tosses out demands and expects me to instantly 'get it.' But I was never taught how to be a princess."

"Let alone a queen," added Bunnie.

"Exactly. All I know about leadership, I learned from running the Freedom Fighters."

"An' under th' circumstances, you did a dang good job too."

"I wish I could tell him that," I whispered. "But I'd feel rude."

"Tell him you need time to adjust," said Bunnie. "It's just been us youngsters up tah this point."

"He doesn't get that. He acts as though I'm willfully rebelling." I stared directly into Bunnie's eyes. "He doesn't understand there's nothing I'd hate more." As the statement passed my lips, I noticed a tone of exasperation in my voice. I realized that I sounded helpless, and I winced a little.

"D'you think that has anything to do with Sugah-hog?" continued Bunnie. I turned my attention back to her. "Sonic is quite the troublemaker," I replied quietly.

"King Acorn don't take too kindly t'that," said Bunnie. "Maybe he thinks you've been swayed by him?"

"You could be right," I realized. "He's almost treating me as if I am Sonic. But I'm not; I'd give anything to be the daughter he wants." Exhausted, I rested my face in my hands. "I could tell you so many stories about how hard I've tried to please him."

"I kin listen," Bunnie said sincerely. She rubbed my neck with her good hand, and I smiled. It was so sweet of her; I could tell she genuinely cared. "Y'want me to make you a cuppa tea while you tell me?"

"That'd be dreamy," I smiled, when a pang of guilt nipped at my heart. "But don't get up. You put yourself out enough tonight with Tails. I'll handle the kettle." The moment I arose, the front door swung open. A flash of blue dashed in. Behind me, a familiarly nasal voice screamed "FIRE!" and I nearly leapt out of my fur. "Sonic!" I hissed grumpily, while he only laughed. "What's the matter Sal?" Sonic grinned. "I'm just having a little fun with you."

"I told you I've been on edge," I replied. "That wasn't funny."

"Aw, learn to take a joke," declared Sonic. "You don't have to run everywhere with your shoulders hunched up!"

Meanwhile, the door to Tails' room opened. Half asleep, he fumbled into the hallway. "Is it morning already?" he asked groggily, and rubbed his eyes.

"Look what you done!" exclaimed Bunnie crossly. She approached Tails and scooped him up. Within moments, she gently rocked him back and forth as she returned him into his room. "Outta be ashamed o' yo'self," Bunnie muttered to Sonic. With her hind leg, she shut Tails' bedroom door behind her.

Sonic grinned, and looked defiantly toward me. "You better not write me up for this," he smiled. "C'mon! Be a pal, Sal!"

"When was the last time I wrote you up Sonic?"

"Nearly the second Max returned," replied Sonic. "With Naugus I might add. Who I was not banking on finding a way outta playing scrabble with your dad for eternity."

"I was," I scowled. "At least to save Dadd…to save the king," I corrected myself as Sonic rolled his eyes. "Also, you were really troubled that the war wasn't over. You were running around breaking things! I was scared you'd hurt yourself. I couldn't help you, and that was just the one time. Why won't you quit bringing it up?"

"Because once is more than enough."

"You write us up more than anyone!" I protested.

"That's different; you guys have been treating me like dirt lately."

"What do you expect Sonic?" I said. "You flip out at the drop of a hat."

"Thanks Sally. There's nothing royalty enjoys more than uncovering the inadequacies of the little people, eh?"

"You're one to talk," I exhaled.

"At least one of us is," said Sonic sarcastically. "You're on monitor duty all the time now. Why'r you avoiding me?"

"Well, you've been giving me negative energy."

"I have, or Daddy has?"

I was about to reply, when icy night air filled the room. I pulled my waistcoat tighter, and turned toward the cold. Sonic had left the door ajar, and a gust of wind blew it wide open. I watched spitefully as an insect crawled through the door, and scuttled past us into the living room. "Where do you get off criticizing me when you can't even remember simple things like keeping the door shut?" I asked, while I walked over and closed it myself.

"Listen to you. You're always attacking me like I'm some kind of Neanderthal jerk, and you have some amazing insight," scolded Sonic.

"This isn't about attacking you Sonic," I lamented. "This is about you treating us with the same respect you demand of everyone else."

"You know what your problem is Sally…?"

"The fact that you're in my life?"

"See, there you go again. This must be great for you. You have me to bash on whenever Max's got you in a bad mood. Any effort to stand up to Daddy would tear away the security blanket you drape over yourself."

"It's not Max to us Sonic," I rectified while preening my bangs nervously. "It's King Acorn."

"I stand corrected," Sonic smirked as he crossed his arms. "That just about describes the size of his brain."

"This is why he doesn't like you," I replied. "You play the rebel."

"I like to think I call it as I see it."

"Well, remember the view might be canted when you're looking through a cyclops eye," I said, pointing directly between Sonic's pupils. He just grinned, and brushed my hand away. "I must confess Sal; I did not expect to be privy to such witticisms whilst in your company." That statement troubled me. Was I becoming more like Sonic? "You know… I don't recall anyone inviting you in here," I said.

"What can I say?" Sonic replied with a lazy shrug. "I have this unnatural ability to appear exactly where I'm needed, exactly when I'm not wanted."

"You're impossible," I snorted, and rolled my eyes.

"Nah," replied Sonic with a grin. "Just impossibly cool."

Bunnie opened the door as I rolled my eyes with contempt. "It's also impossibly late fo' quarrelling," she yawned.

"You too Bunnie?" asked Sonic. "What happened tonight to make me the public punching-bag?"

"Fo' one, this is the fifth time yuh woke Tails up," lamented Bunnie.

"Yeah, this week," replied Sonic. "But it was only once tonight. You act as if I'm performing my greatest hits."

Bunnie just shook her head. "Ah need to wash up befo' bed. It's way too late for me to be out 'n about."

"Try not to wake Tails up when you're removing all that makeup," called Sonic as Bunnie entered the bathroom. "You'll need a chainsaw!" I heard her groan as she shut the door.

"Can I explain something to you Sonic?" I asked.

"Shoot," he replied.

"We're Freedom Fighters. That's not a title we came up with for ourselves; it's a military rank. Now that the king's returned, we have even more responsibilities. While they may seem unreasonable to you, these do include treating each other with respect."

"Fascinating. So either deriding or ignoring me at every turn are examples of respectful military discourse?"

"You know what; I don't have to take this. I'm going back to monitor duty," I scolded as I walked toward the door.

"Back to monitor duty…?"

"Unlike you Sonic, some of us have responsibilities."

"Oh come on Sal. You mean to tell me you've been giving me a hard time when you're playing hooky?"

"I am not!" I said in a tone uncomfortably close to how I talked to Sonic when I was six. "I just needed a quick break. I thought you said monitor duty was stupid anyway."

"It is. But you act like the weight of the world is on your shoulders, rather than that massive head. Yet here you are, idly chit-chatting with Bunnie."

"All the more reason for me to head back."

"I guess. All you're doing is staring at screens."

"Hey, someone needs to make sure none of our strongholds are compromised."

"Ri-i-i-i-ight. Because Knothole would fall apart if the Great Sally Acorn wasn't watching over us?"

"A monarch needs to make sure her people are secure and…"

"Oh yes," intoned Sonic sarcastically. "By performing monitor duty of all things; truly a task worthy of royalty. Tell me, whose idea was that? Was it yours, or did Daddy suggest it when you embarrassed him because you couldn't even wear that crown without it looking crooked?"

"You're right, I couldn't. But why is that Sonic? I'll tell you. For ten years now, you've kept me from learning anything that could've prepared me for this."

"Don't pin that on me Sal," scoffed Sonic. "There was no way we could've known that he'd turn up alive."

"The fact is, he did, and…"

"…And you're not learning anything that'll impress Max by watching a bunch of computer screens either. Worst of all, you know that. And you still bow to his every whim. We all know it's just to compensate for the time you spent apart." He was right, and I didn't know how to respond. I half-expected him to apologize for throwing such a low blow, but instead he just carried on. "Look around you Sal, does Knothole look like a royal palace? We get here by jumping into a tree-stump, for Pete's sake!"

"You're not one to talk," I muttered. "You're the very incarnation of anarchy."

"At least I admit it, and you know what? Unlike you, I'm happy. Maybe one day I'll play the nomad. But for the time being, I choose to hang around here. Meanwhile, you like to act like you're so refined. That Robotnik was just a tyrant. Well, compare Knothole to Robotropolis. If you're so sophisticated 'Queenie,' why do we rely on a water wheel for basic electricity?"

"Are you seriously implying that Robotnik's way was better?"

"Of course not," snorted Sonic. "But it makes a point, doesn't it? Let's say your old man succeeds. We beat Snively and rebuild Mobotroplis in the Acorn image. Just how different is that going to be from Robotropolis? Who's to say we aren't just trading one dictator for another?"

"Listen…uh…." I was caught without a line and didn't know how to respond. "Look, I have a logical argument against that, I…"

"Coming from you, logic sounds about as natural as the fact that I'm blue, Sal."

"If it's all the same to you Sonic, I'd prefer to contemplate the pigment of your fur from the distance of a computer monitor."

I watched Sonic shrug, then open the refrigerator door. He reached for the stash of chill-dogs Bunnie and I kept for when he visited. He didn't bother to ask permission; he just unsealed the plastic and began chewing obnoxiously. I opened the front door and placed a single foot upon the grass. Then I turned back to glare at him. My hair quivered in the breeze as our eyes met. "Are you waiting for my encore," Sonic asked. "Or does her highness wish to be escorted across the block?" My displeasure boiled into rage, and I slammed the door behind me. By the time I arrived at the monitor hut, my anger melted into frustrated weeping. With my hand on the door handle, I shivered like an abandoned animal. When I summoned the wits to venture inside, I stopped to sigh at the emptiness before me. I took a seat, and reached out to turn on the nearest monitor. I saw my fuzzy face reflected in the black mirror, and paused. For a moment, I wished that I looked less like me.

The computer hummed loudly as it started. The sound was curiously soothing, and I shut my eyes. In the peacefulness of my mind, I envisioned myself by a swimming pool. I held a cool glass of iced tea in one hand, and a good book in the other. This produced a faint, but genuine gleam in my heart. I imagined myself wearing my crown properly while I read my paperback. Father offered Bunnie and Antoine some refreshments while mother splashed in the pool with Tails. She was alive, and as healthy as ever. Even Snively was there. He argued with Rotor over the most efficient way to heat the pool. Meanwhile, a reformed Julian merrily flipped burgers on a grill. There was no anger anymore, no violence or hate. My fantasyland knew only peace and understanding. From behind, I imagined gloved fingers curling in mine as soft lips placed a kiss upon my neck. "Love you Sal," Sonic whispered in my ear. A smile crossed my lips, but it was a weary one. My imaginary world was too perfect to take seriously. The muscles in my face flexed with frustration, and I opened my eyes. That was a stupid fantasy, I decided. It was best to dismiss it. But it wouldn't go away. Like the ghost of a dead relative, it persistently whispered to me.

The moon outside hid behind clouds, and the monitor room grew even darker. A gloomy murmur passed my lips, as I remembered when I used to be optimistic. I wondered what had changed recently. After a while, I suppose life just takes its toll on you. My hands laced tightly across my chest, and I began watching the monitors. After a few minutes, my eyes began to droop in boredom. I noticed my laces were tied at the bottom of my boots. I recalled a tradition from grade school. Girls would lace their shoes at the bottom if they had feelings for someone. Like rocks on an otherwise clear ocean, memories poked through my mind. At that age, my hair was tied back in a braid that was always coming loose. It's a small wonder I started cutting it short. That always bothered father, but not as much as the terrible crush I had on Sonic. My heart burst whenever he was around, like the paper bags Rosie used to pack my lunches. While I waited for the school bus, Sonic would speed through a puddle and splash me. Sometimes I'd call to him, but he disappeared as quickly as dust in a summer wind. I'd draw back and swoon, lost in the spell he cast. Then one day he ruined it all by speaking.

It was midday, and I was alone climbing trees. My hair kept getting in my eyes, and I had complained to Rosie until she cut it short. I also cast aside my dress, and wore a vest and boots instead. Then I ventured toward a tall oak tree. This was a simple rebellion, but it was freeing all the same. The bark was rough under my hands, and it took me a few tries before I was climbing. Eventually, I reached the first branch, and beamed with pride. When I looked down however, I felt very small. I gulped, and wondered if father was correct about my fragility. Suddenly there was a flash of blue, and I nearly fell out of the tree. Down below, I saw Sonic grinning up at me. This was the first time he acknowledged my presence, and I gasped. In that instant, I felt a thousand times freer and a million times more scared. He just laughed, and dashed away. The wind blew the hair from my forehead and I let go of the branch in shock. I let out a little yelp as I fell. In a second, Sonic returned and caught me. I stared at him and blinked bashfully for a moment. "I'm Sonic!" he abruptly cried. "What's your name?" I smiled back at him gratefully, but was too nervous to reply. "It's okay if you can't talk," he said. "We can still be pals." Relief washed over me, and I blushed. "Hey," Sonic grinned. "Wanna see something cool?" I nodded with silent trepidation, and Sonic burst into a dash. Wisps of cloud spun past our heads as he ran, and I grinned with exaltation. As we accelerated, the air began to taste of debris. I didn't mind, as that was the first time I felt content. Moments like that are what I live for.

We stopped under a bridge, and Sonic chuckled. "Don't worry kid," he said. "There ain't no trolls down here, but there is one neato stream!" Like it was yesterday, I remember watching the sunlight glisten upon the water. The lush green leaves on the tree branches framed it like a painting. Without setting me down, Sonic bent over and picked up a stone. He chucked it into the water and laughed heartily at the splashing sound it made. I grinned coyly; it took so little to amuse him. "If you think this is cool, you should see it from above!" Sonic smiled. "It's way past cool!" With me in tow, he ran up the tree trunk. I sat upon his lap upon the highest branch. "What did I tell you?" Sonic grinned at me.

"It sure does look awful nice up here," I replied softly. "Why, I think it's the bestest view ever!"

"Your voice is higher than we are kid," Sonic said. He was attempting to appear confused, but there was something knowing in his tone. "Why ain't I seen ya in school until this week?"

"My Daddy wanted me to be trained just in the castle," I replied. "But Mommy said it'd be good for me to be us-posed to folks my age." I shut my eyes, attempting to appear refined.

"The castle? Does your dad work there?"

"No you dumb-dumb," I said. "He's the king!"

"You're a princess?" He appeared shocked, and I felt like an imposter. "Yuck!" he continued, and shoved me off his lap. "I thought you was a boy too, or I never woulda touched you. Lucky I'm wearing gloves, girls have cooties!"

"What'r cooties?" I asked.

"They're like, girl germs or something. I think they make you smell. An' you have a bad case of being a smelly ol' girl!" He pinched his nose with mock disgust, and leap to the ground. "Well…you have a case of…of being a big stupid head!" I cried as I slowly climbed down the tree.

"I'm not stupid," Sonic grinned. He tapped his foot impatiently while waiting for me to arrive on the ground. "You just think so cuz girls are more boring'n church,"

"Well, boys are more stupider than rocks!" I retorted.

"Girls don't know nothing," Sonic laughed. "Your heads'r way up in the stars."

"No, YOUR'S is, rock-head!" I hissed, and tossed a rock at his cranium. "You're saying I'm a rock star?" laughed Sonic, as he dodged the rock effortlessly. I let out an angry cry, and tackled him to the dirt. It wasn't long before we were beating each other senseless. In that instant, we became best friends.

Within another two years, that began to fade. I was changing, and Sonic wasn't. I spent most days in the library reading stories that were old even when father was young. Zorro, Robin Hood, Superman, King Arthur… the list was endless. Lord knows how, but Rosie even managed to salvage a few of those tomes in the early months of the war. When I take the volumes off my shelf , they smell of dust and childhood.

Conversely, Sonic had the soul of a vagabond. He had little patience for books, preferring to explore forbidden regions. I noticed I was spending more time reading and less time with him. The war forced us to spend time together, and as such we grew closer. I wonder if we'd even still know one another otherwise. The idea troubled me, and the beginnings of a hole poked through my heart. Sometimes at night when I can't sleep, I hear wind whistling. My windows are always sealed, so I can't imagine where the sound originates. This seems absurd, but part of me believes that the wind runs through cracks in my soul. Once I held my breath to trap it. I just wanted to feel something inside of me.

"Wouldn't that be nice," said a nasal voice. I registered Sonic's presence long before I turned to face him, but I didn't remember him opening the door. He seemed like a figure from a dream, fading away as consciousness returned. Then he looked at me sharply, almost as if he caught my thought. As I observed him, I ventured a question. "What would be nice?"

"I heard you say you say something about wanting to feel," Sonic replied. "You have a bad habit of talking to yourself."

"Well, it's hardly the worst habit I have," I said as I stared into a monitor.

"That's for sure," Sonic declared as he strode toward me.

"Yeah," I replied. "My habit of talking to myself is almost as bad as my habit of talking to you."

"Or your viewing habits," Sonic declared as he perused the Knothole video footage. "What are you watching, the latest from Andy Warhol?"

"Very funny Sonic," I sighed. "But I'm trying to work, and I thought you had enough of me."

"I just couldn't let you get away with your scheme, Sal."

"What 'scheme'?"

"That sly endeavor to stir guilt within my fragile heart," Sonic chuckled, his hand over his chest.

"What are you talking about?"

"I know how this is meant to play. You're going to be hanging around Rotor's toolshed tomorrow, spreading gossip about what a terrible friend I am. That's the problem with a one-night fight Sal; it always follows you for at least a week."

"Well, most of us mature adults don't invest that much energy into reliving every slight made against us."

"Well, I hope you're proud."

"Proud of what?"

"That advanced moral compass you wear so proudly. I bet it's just grand to show off it off to a bum like me."

"That's you to a tee, isn't it, Sonic?" I moaned. "We fight, and then you just come in here to heckle me some more."

"No Sal," Sonic sighed. "I'm here because I want to smooth things over."

"Why? So you can feel more secure that nothing I'm going to say tomorrow will intrude on your 'cool'?"

"Man, you're really going to make me say it aren't you Sally?"

I paused. Did he call me Sally?

"I'm sorry Sally," Sonic said quietly but sincerely.

He said it again! I turned to look at him, and saw something genuine in his eyes. "It's okay Sonic," I sighed. "I get it."

Sonic gave me a playful pat on my back. In an instant, he returned to his usual persona. "That's the Sal I know!" he grinned. "Now that we're pals again, what do you say we cut the home movies and watch something cooler?"

"Tempting," I replied sarcastically. "But even if I was willing to disappoint the king and take even more time off work, where are we going to find anything to watch?"

"You kidding?" Sonic asked. "I talked Tails into loading a bunch of old movies into NICOLE from Snively's history files last time we trashed Robotropolis."

"I remember, but I wish I didn't. Which is why I'm glad I'm the one with NICOLE now." I lifted a hand to pat my coat pocket, but found nothing. In a panic, I turned to Sonic.

"Looking for this?" he asked as he dangled NICOLE before my eyes, and then zipped away as I grasped for her.

"HEY!" I cried. "Sonic, give her back!"

"You barely heard me sneak in here," Sonic sniggered. "I swiped her off you just as easily."

"Then you can just as easily give her back!" I said, as I got up off my seat. "Sonic, I'm serious. I need to start being responsible!"

"Listen to you," said Sonic with faux distain. "I offer you the forgotten luxury that is a movie night, and you want to watch over a village we coulda fished out of a Smurf bargain bin."

"Well… what do you plan on watching anyway?"

"Mark of Exorcism 666," replied Sonic. "Wanna join me?"

"No thanks," I said while I rolled my eyes. "I missed the first five-hundred and ninety-nine."

"Suit yourself," said Sonic as he lounged upon a couch. "But I'm not giving NICOLE back until it's over."

I sighed, and turned my attention back to the monitor. The sound of the movie distracted me for an hour. I began rubbing my clavicle with frustration. Finally, my reticence was overcome with boredom.

"How long is that thing?" I asked as I approached Sonic. "I dunno," said Sonic as he raised an eyebrow. "Any ideas, Nikki?"

"-FILM IS 108 MINUTES SONIC MY MAN-" NICOLE replied. "-MONDO COOL SELECTION BY THE WAY-"

I sneered at Sonic, and he looked away while grinning bashfully. "I really shouldn't have let you use her so often…" I groaned.

"Don't be so hard on me," said Sonic. "That's what got us fighting in the first place."

"You're practically begging for it when you watch junk like this," I said as I pointed at the screen. "The makeup on that demon is terrible. And why is that girl wearing an outfit like that, especially during a chase? No one could run in that."

"Given the bad effects, my guess is they needed something else to exploit."

"And you watch this junk?"

"Have an open mind Sal," replied Sonic. "Some of the greatest directors of all time got their start in horror: Francis Ford Coppola, David Cronenberg…"

"Why is she naked now?"

"At least it's more logical; you said it'd be hard to run in that get up."

"So she stopped to undress with a demon right behind her?"

"People do weird things when they're scared Sal. One time I wore pants."

I almost laughed, when footfalls sounded behind us. We turned to see Bunnie standing in the doorway. A tray of milk and cookies was in her hands. She wore a purple bathrobe, green face moisturizer, and her ears were wrapped in curlers. "Oh great," grumbled Sonic. "It's you again."

Bunnie closed her eyes and lifted her nose into the air with a, "hmpf!" Then she replied, "If I'd a knowed I was gonna see you here, I'd have come by tomorrow."

"Technically, it's one in the morning," replied Sonic.

"When you're in these moods, I reckon seeing you even once a day is more'n enough."

"Ease up on him Bunnie," I said. "We patched things up."

"Hurm," grunted Bunnie as she placed trey on the coffee table nearby. "I still say y'outta learn how t'treat a lady."

"Will do," Sonic grinned as he snagged a cookie. "Thanks for the snack!"

"That's supposed t'be fir Sally," Bunnie sighed, and regarded me with concern. "I was all set fo' bed, but I couldn't stand tah leave you all alone an…ACK! WHAT IN TARNATION IS THAT CRITTER?" Bunnie was frightened upon seeing the demon on NICOLE's screen; her ears popped right out of the curlers.

"What, this?" replied Sonic nonchalantly. "A home movie of you before bedtime."

"It's just makeup effects Bunnie," I sighed. "Bad ones, I might add."

"Y'all should be ashamed of yo'selves! What if Tails wanders in here wanting fo' a glass a'water?"

"What a repugnant notion that would be," replied Sonic as he glanced toward me. Bunnie didn't know about the stash of horror comics Tails kept hidden under his mattress.

"Listen Bunnie, I'm sorry…I'll tell Sonic to…"

"Hey Bunnie, if you think that was bad, check out the screen now."

Bunnie glanced toward NICOLE, and then ran out of the hut screaming.

"SONIC! That was terrible! She probably woke up half of Knothole."

"Maybe they need a wakeup call if they're toadying to Max half as much as you two are."

"Even setting aside your complete lack of respect for _MY OWN FATHER_, Bunnie comes from a very sheltered upbringing. She's probably never seen someone's…" I faltered and looked away. "Someone's behind before," I finished with crossed arms.

"She'll get over seeing somebody's butt. Heck, she's been fighting Robotnik's butt for years. His name is Snively."

"This is no time for jokes."

"Why not? This entire 'kingdom' is a joke."

"Sonic, if you're that fed up with the king; remember we'll both be in trouble with him tomorrow."

"You're going to be promoted to queen in a week; you'll find a way out of it."

"Theoretically. But if I can't even go through monitor duty without incident, it's doubtful."

"Who cares? That guy's old, he'll probably die soon anyway."

"How dare you talk about my fath-the king, that way!"

"Man, are you still correcting yourself when you call your dad…'_Dad? '_ Listen to yourself Sal!" Sonic switched off the movie and shoved NICOLE back to me. "Just when I thought you were starting to loosen up, you act like this. Have you forgotten all about that kiss?"

"That…that was the heat of the moment Sonic…" I hesitated. "We had just defeated Robotnik. We were all excited and…. and sometimes you just get… you just…."

"This was a bad idea," Sonic interrupted. "I'm going to bed."

"It's like you don't even care anymore…"

I looked at him, and he looked at me for a long while. "Sal, King Acorn's been back a month and he's already building another Totalitarian regime. Worse'n that, he's changing you. If I'm going to continue to live here, my attitude has to be that I just don't care." He waited for a response, but received none. I clutched my arm, and looked down at the ground guiltily. Sonic's face softened a little, but not by much. "Maybe one day I'll find something that works better," he continued. "But right now this is all I have." After he shut the door, I never felt more alone.

**END OF EPISODE ONE**


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